Question: Will I really die if I don't subscribe?
Answer: No. No you will not.
Question: Yo! How much does this cost? I'm still waiting on my ObamaCare savings to come through.
Answer: Strange. Same here. We must be the only 2.
Good news. It's free.
Question: Are you going to try and sell me a membership?
Answer: Yes. That's sort of how this works.
By the way, are you interested in teaching your kids to love America? If so you should totally click here to learn more.